Real Women. Real Experiences. – Nellie D
Q: Tell me about yourself. Where are you from? How many kids do you have?
A: My husband and I live in Chicago (Logan Square neighborhood) and had our first baby in October.
Q: How was your pregnancy? The good? The bad?
A: My pregnancy was much different than I expected! Nothing like how it is portrayed in the media or like what I had heard about from others. It was overall good. I didn’t have any nausea or morning sickness which I didn’t know was possible. I was able to be active throughout, with the only thing holding me back being hot weather during my third trimester. No crazy cravings, no stretch marks, no crazy mood swings, all things that are emphasized when pregnancy comes up in movies. I experienced fatigue throughout, mostly in the first trimester. I also experienced a strain socially. I was the first of my close friends to get pregnant, so it was difficult to keep up with the usual social activities, most of which still heavily revolved around drinking. I still attended everything (weekends at bars, friends weddings) but I didn’t feel 100% like myself socially for most of my pregnancy.
Q: How was your labor and delivery? Did you birth at home? Hospital? C-section?
A: I had a hospital vaginal birth. 21 hours of labor, 14 minutes of pushing. I went to my 40-week appointment on my due date and my doctor did a non-stress test. After 1 deceleration was observed during the test my doctor decided to send me to labor & delivery to induce me that day. I would have liked to go into labor naturally at home, but genetically it was doubtful that was going to happen. I was given pitocin at 4:30pm along with a foley balloon to help me dilate (I had been dilated to 1 cm for 3 weeks). After 3 hours the foley balloon came out meaning I was dilated to 3-4cm. Shortly after, my water broke. From there I had contractions until I asked for the epidural around 9:30pm. It worked until around 1:30am when I felt pain on the left side of my body and had to get a "booster" epidural. My doctor had me "labor down" to try to have gravity help baby drop down as low as possible to try to reduce the time and effort of pushing. I started pushing at around noon, and delivered at 12:14pm.
Q: Describe your postpartum experience. Did you experience postpartum depression? Postpartum anxiety? Postpartum rage? Were you aware of these things postpartum?
A: Postpartum wasn't too crazy. I felt physical pain for about 1 week - longer than I expected, but after 1 week it all was gone. No depression, anxiety, or rage specifically. Just general nerves about trying to care for this new human with no prior experience.
Q: Did you breastfeed? If so, how did that go for you? If it was challenging, what were your challenges?
A: Yes, 1.5 months in and currently breastfeeding. I have flat nipples so the first time feeding in the hospital my baby latched with a very shallow latch. This tore up both nipples and made it very painful for the first week. To help with this, the lactation consultant recommended I use a nipple shield. This ultimately solved the problem. My nipples recovered and my baby has fed very well ever since. However, I resented using the shield because it was a hassle. It was something else to clean after each feeding. It took more time to get ready to feed my hungry crying baby because I had to make sure I had the shield with me and put it in place. My baby would knock it off by accident and get fussy while I put it back on. It made it more difficult to coordinate feeding in public (it was difficult to hold in place and get baby to latch while trying to stay covered). 3.5 weeks in I met with the LC again to try to get my baby to latch without the shield. The appointment ended with the LC recommending I continue to use the shield permanently as my baby would not latch without. It was difficult to come to terms with that, but ultimately having a fed baby is the most important thing.
Q: Did you have any pregnancy cravings?
Nope! I ate a lot of fruit in the first trimester, and a lot of sweets throughout, but both are pretty typical for my diet.
Q: What’s something you never knew about until you were pregnant?
A: How anxious I would be during pregnancy. The first few months before I could feel baby's kicks were the hardest. I always assumed the worst was happening in the 4 weeks between appointments. Even after I could feel baby moving there was anxiety if it seemed like too much time had passed between movements, or the movements felt different (slower, weaker). It was very difficult for me to stay calm between doctors appointments, but hearing baby's heartbeat at each appointment would calm me down for a week or two.
Q: What was something that surprised you about your postpartum journey?
A: How physically demanding breastfeeding is. It takes a lot of time and effort, plus extra calories and hydration to keep up with it, and it is something that only mom can do. It works magic for sucking away the pregnancy weight gain, though.
Q: If there was a gift to give a new mom, what would it be?
A: A white noise machine for every room of your house, every car, every diaper bag you might have. It’s crazy how quickly it works to soothe an overtired baby!
Q: If you could give a new mom some advice what would it be?
A: In my experience, the first two weeks with baby home were relatively easy. My husband was on PTO and we were able to tackle everything with the baby and keep up with house chores, cooking, etc. between the two of us. Starting week 3 things became more difficult as baby became more demanding. If you are planning on having family stay with you to help out, consider starting this during week 3 or 4. That would have been a bigger help to me rather than weeks 1 and 2.